The Mystery on the Seventeenth Floor

We’re still pissed when we get to the address Nancy sent: a tall downtown office building. It’s Saturday, but the front door’s unlocked. I poke the elevator call button, glance at the position indicator, calculate wait time, exhale aggressively. Nancy’s told us nothing. Seems like Ned, up there with her now, is always in the loop, a permanent piece of her MO. Ned can be kind of a dick, if you ask me, and not the useful Sam Spade kind. The elevator arrives, we get in, it starts its ascent, then slams to a stop, between 7 and 8. WTF?

[100/mystery/permanent/riding in an elevator]

 

 

Rules to Nurture a Blossoming Romance or Assemble Furniture or Nurture a Blossoming Romance While Assembling Furniture*

Be prepared. Read instructions. Understanding the big picture will help you avoid mistakes. This job merits correct tools. Wrong tools can damage parts/make assembly unnecessarily difficult.

Start slow. Resist temptation to skip ahead/make assumptions. Rushing can compromise stability and safety. Be patient, focused.

 

Avoid common pitfalls. Containers can help you use the right parts at the right time.

 

Keep it safe. Use proper techniques to avoid strain/injury. Get help if necessary. Secure things.

Troubleshoot mistakes. Don’t panic. Try to identify the issue. You may need to disassemble a portion to correct the mistake. Professional assistance may save you significant time/frustration.

 

*Based on and heavily paraphrased from Taskrabbit’s “A Beginner’s Guide for Hassle-Free Furniture Assembly” video on YouTube.

[100/romance/merit/assembling furniture]

 

Rapduction

The cup of coconut chocolate chip in hand, its first perfect icy bite successfully spooned into my delighted mouth, apparently heralded the power-outage-swiftly-followed-by-shafts-of-bright-lights dropping from—above?—that seemingly shot through the parlor’s solid roof, spotlighting staff, customers, all silently tunnelsucked upward, now disappeared—all but I, who had immediately ducked beneath the counter wondering rapture? abduction? and either way deciding no, I choose ice cream, even if it was God, even if I missed it, forgive me, it is delicious, so sweet and so cold.

[100/science fiction/beneath/eating ice cream]